Phew – that’s our Euro road trip so far, and what a trip it has been. Easily our best holiday yet with just ourselves, the beautiful landscape and Augustus (our pet Audi) for company. We’ve been adopting a policy of avoiding all toll roads, which means zero motorways and 100 per cent delicious and jaw-dropping scenic views and small towns. We feel so privileged to have experienced what we have so far – it’s beyond belief!
When we first set off on our trip people openly told us we were nuts – why would you spend so much time driving all over the show, when you could just relax in a sun chair after a flight somewhere? Honestly, we’re laughing all the way to the next glass of Italian Chianti as you don’t know a country until you’ve driven it’s roads, seen the exquisite towns rather than the token tourist spots, and stayed in a haunted ex-leper colony. Yes, you did read that correctly, but more about this later!
So off we set on Tuesday night and by now we almost know the road to Dover like the back of our hand. France is notorious for its motorways and toll roads but after noticing we would save an hour and a half (at 3am this is a significant saving) we decided to pay a few euro... How much could it be? After our first toll of €20.80, we were not in a happy place, but as we were too tired to care we carried on along, before arriving in Chalons en Champagne at 4am – phew! A very pretty place, but one for our next driving weekend, the next morning we were up and on the road and this time made our decision to avoid all toll roads. A very wise decision in retrospect as this meant we were taken through the beautiful countryside and the drive just flew by – all eight hours of it! We drove through Alsace and Lorraine (annexed by Germany during the great wars) stopping in Toul and Nancy for snacks. We chanced upon a massive supermarket where we spent an inordinate amount of time looking at the different type of bread, cheese and cut meats – the French know how to do it let me tell you that. So we purchased up a storm and spend the rest of the drive stuffing our faces whilst gasping at the scenery – great combo!
(I interrupt this blog to inform you of my absolutely stunning surroundings. As I type this, we are in an apartment in Bellagio, situated up a tiny cobbled alley that overlooks a 12th century church, a glass of wine in hand, listening to the church chime bells every 15 minutes – it doesn’t get much better really does it?)
So we frolic through France, jump into Germany (Freibourg, Lake Konstanz), and swing through Switzerland (St Gallen), ending up in Austria, which is very much alive with the sound of music! We spent the night in a small medieval town in the Austrian Alps called Feldkirch – so awesome! Our hostel, Jugendherberge youth hostel, was this huge, old, wooden medieval building, which I thought was the bee’s knees, that is until Brad went to have a shower and I stumbled across a sheet of information... Always curious and keen to expand upon my extensive knowledge base, I decided to have a read. So all alone, curled up in a tiny wooden gaol cell, which I previously thought of as quaint, I learned that we were staying at a FORMER LEPER COLONY, which was where people were sent to DIE! It was also used throughout the black plague that shook Europe, as a final place when there was no hope. In fact, if I came down with the black plague they would put me (alive and well) on the back of a funeral truck with the other sickies, drive us through town, have a funeral for us before ‘burying’ us in a ceremony where we laid down in graves, the priest sprinkles us with dirt, then when everyone had shed their tears, up we’d hop and we’d be dropped off at that exact place we were staying! I’d spend the rest of my days not entering a church, school, or public bathhouse and just to deter members of the public from approaching me I would be wearing a full black cloak and be given a rattle which I would have to shake every time someone approached to warn them. As you can imagine I was awake half the night in sheer terror of hearing a ghostly rattle, prowling the corridors. Great story now, bloody terrifying the same time last night!
After dragging my mattress on the floor so it was closer to Brad’s bottom bunk, we slept surprisingly well (despite waking several times in the night when I forced myself to keep my eyes shut, afraid of what I’d see if I opened them) and were up on our way at 8am, via the supermarket of course for a good Austrian breakfast of sausages, pretzels, baps, cheese and salami. Austria – what a place. Think Sound of Music and you’re there, such a cliché but a cliché for a reason – we love it and are looking forward to checking out the bigger cities like Vienna, but for the mean time Alp country just takes our breath away!
Liechtenstein, the third smallest country in Europe (behind Vatican City and Andorra) and famed for the highest denture exports in the world (it’s a fact!), Vaduz, the capital city, was next on the agenda and just 20 minutes away from Austria and Switzerland it was an easy find. Liechtenstein is still run by its own monarchy whom reside in a castle on the Alps, overlooking the city, and only open it to visitors once a year on Liechtenstein’s national day. Unfortunately today wasn’t that day, but we did have a whale of the time wandering around and getting our token Passport stamps from the tourism office. Liechtenstein is the only place in Europe where you can actually ask for a stamp – not a renowned claim to fame, but a claim to fame all the same!
Now came the most exquisite part of the drive – through the Swiss Alps into Northern Italy. It was truly a remarkable experience and once again we find ourselves at a loss for words when describing how stunning Switzerland really is. It really is impossible to convey its beauty, so I’ll just say that we were driving for over four hours and it really did feel like four minutes!
Which brings us to Italia – ciao bella! Here we are in Bellagio on beautiful Lake Como – a stunning cobbled town of tiny alleys and streets, right on a breathtaking lake with a backdrop of the Italian Alps. Mr Clooney apparently has a holiday home here and if it’s good enough for him, it’s good enough for us! It’s not the cheapest place, but you can see why.
We arrived here at around 3pm and spent the afternoon exploring, slurping on the gelato (times two of course), and taking 101 pictures. Brad picked up a few brochures and played the tour guide, taking me on a walking tour of the local sites. Aside from his Super Mario Brothers accent, he was a star! I had to have words and begged him to stop, it was driving me nuts! Mind you, if he had a euro for every time I have said ‘Ciao bella’ he would be putting a down payment on George’s luxury pad!
Italy is sooooo cool – just what you imagine, with the only down side being the stares you get from 50 per cent of the race. Not even really staring, they look at you like you’re a prize cow, inspecting every detail. And they’re not selective – every single girl is subjected to the same treatment. Brad actually laughed as he turned back a good 100m down the road to see a few particularly rapey individuals still standing there, crotch rubbing with dirty smirks on faces!
After a beautiful afternoon we headed out for an amazing dinner (it’s Italy, what did you expect?) – red wine, pizza, red wine, pasta, red wine, espresso, red wine. Bellissimo! We stumbled across a gem of a restaurant, lake front, where after asking for a table on the lake, we were regretfully informed that they only had one left. We traipsed behind, the thought of food keeping us going, only to be led to a private table on its own little deck, surrounded by a fence of flowers – a table good enough for George Clooney himself (they must have mistaken Brad for his son). Beyond amazing...
Which brings me to the present – slightly tipsy and listening to church bells. Did I mention I love Italy?
Tomorrow it’s a lazy day where we’ll meander our way to Verona, the setting for Romeo and Juliet and often referred to as Italy’s most beautiful city. God doesn’t life suck sometimes?
Ciao bella – arrivederci!
xx
You lucky young lovers! I travel for a living and never had such an incredible tour of Europe!! Travel safe, enjoy the moments, and savor the memories ;-)
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