Knocking about in Norway

Taking full advantage of a bank holiday weekend, we decided to head to Oslo, Norway courtesy of Norwegian Air. We very nearly didn’t get here thanks to another Iceland volcanic eruption, as well as a lovely facial rash... Intrigued? Read on!


So after carefully monitoring the weather reports all week and checking in with our travel insurers we were preparing ourselves for a long weekend in London, not our planned three day Oslosean getaway. To throw a spanner in the works I woke up on Thursday to a wee facial rash which was a charming surprise. I thought nothing more of it, but after vomiting in the toilets at work then looking in the mirror to find that the wee rash speckling had taken over my face, I thought it best to head to the doctor. There has been an adult measles outbreak in London, which had the whole body breaking out in a phantom rash, and I just wanted to double check that I could fly. True to NHS form, the doctor’s exact words were ‘Oh wow... I have no idea what this is. Try an antihistamine’, so rather than muck around and check in the mirror every few seconds, Brad picked me up from Stockwell Group Practice and we hooned it to Gatwick where we just managed to get a sneaky Big Mac in before flying out to Norway.

As we landed in Oslo, my first thoughts were confused ones. We were landing at 11.05pm, but were met with light. Double checking the flight time, it soon dawned on us that we were experiencing the infamous midnight sun Scandinavia is famous for in summer. Like our Iceland trip in the height of winter, Scandinavians don’t see the sun for six months of the year. They sure make up for it in summer though.


The name of our hostel, Oslo Budget Hotel, really says it all. But when you’re in Oslo, the most expensive city in the world (that’s a fact) you jump at the chance for budget. While it was extremely cheap by Norwegian standards, you’d be ropeable if you paid that for a 5 star in hotel in NZ! It did the job and was all we needed – plus we had the added bonus of an English channel. I never thought I’d be so happy to see an episode of ‘Are you smarter than a 5th grader’ in my life!

Brad had been a right SWOT before this trip and had the maps, sights and public transport system down perfectly before we even left Clapham, so he very much lead the way. We spent Saturday wandering the streets, marvelling at the cost of everything, slurping back the hot chocolates at Norway’s version of Starbucks, as well as shivering from time to time. Even though it’s summer, we were still wearing thermals and jackets.





We spent time wandering through the streets visiting the Royal Palace, City Hall and Oslo Cathedral. We then headed to Aker Brygge, which is a lovely nautical area right on the harbour, where we spent a few hours watching the ships, eating hot dogs (so popular in Scandinavia, its crazy. First Iceland, then Denmark now Norway – roll on Sweden in August). We then headed up to Akershus, which is the world’s oldest sea fortress and provides one of the postcard pictures of Oslo.



Oslo really is very pretty and is similar to New Zealand in the fact that it is surrounded by sea, the air is super fresh and the surrounding country is clean and green; however, Norway is one step ahead of the entire world when it comes to the environment and is famed for how clean the country is. Everywhere you looked you could see electric cars zipping around, as well as charging at the countless charging spots around the city. It’s also so very different to New Zealand in the fact that it is bloody cold, the sun never goes down in summer and doesn’t rise in winter, and the people look so foreign. They’re definitely one of the prettier races but it’s not surprising given it is Scandinavia. Blonde hair, blue eyes, but like Copenhagen, there’s a strong alternative side to the city and it seems if you weren’t blessed with the pretty Scandinavian genes, you pierce the hell out of your face and wear witches clothing!

Sunday we were up relatively early as we had decided to purchase an Oslo card, which essentially offers tourists free public transport, discounts at restaurants and free admission to the majority of attractions. We would never normally invest in something like this, instead preferring to think that we are ‘above all that touristy shite’, but here we found ourselves, first in line, meekly asking for the passes. There was a ton of stuff we wanted to see and Brad had done the math, so as a result we learned a heck of a lot that day!


First stop was the Nobel Peace centre, which in case you didn’t know was developed in Oslo by Alfred Nobel, where we zoomed around taking it all in. A short time later we jumped aboard the ferry which took us to Bygdǿy – or Bigdog Museum Island as we referred to it as. We had our hearts set on checking out the Viking museum, which didn’t disappoint. Complete with three Viking ships from the 8th century we wandered around for a while marvelling at the artefacts and learning all about these fascinating wee people.

Next stop, the Norske Folkemuseum, which was a fantastic outdoor museum, complete with hundreds of authentic traditional buildings from all over Norway, which had been relocated to the museum. They even had everyone dressed up in traditional costume, dancing, baking – you name it. The museum’s claim to fame was that you got to see the entirety of Norway in this one wee spot and the best part was, it would normally cost around NZ$25, but with our pass it was free. That little gem more than made its money’s worth.




The Folkemuseum had a fascinating exhibition on the Sami culture of Norway, which is essentially an indigenous population which was oppressed severely throughout history and even today there is still an undercurrent of racism. The odd thing is, if a Sami and Norwegian were dressed in the same outfit you’d have no idea who was who – they look the same. You can only spot a Sami when they’re in traditional dress. They traditionally live in the far North and rely on reindeer and fishing, living across northern Scandinavia and Russia.

The latter half of our day was spent on a lovely cruise of the Oslo fjord, complete with a cute Norsk guide. It was no Hong Kong harbour cruise, but fascinating all the same as we toured tiny islands in the Oslo fjord, where people live and ferry into Oslo Sentrum for work. It’s incredibly deep (200m) and it freezes over in winter so you can walk from island to island. Because it is so deep, cruise ships come in all the time and as we were there yesterday the Queen Mary 2 had docked.

You’ll note we haven’t mentioned food very much so far... It’s because there’s not a lot to say really. We’ve barely eaten! A McDonald’s Chicken McNugget combo costs NZ$24, so we’ve tried to live off the muesli bars we brought and when we can’t manage, savour a hot dog or cheeseburger! We just refuse to pay NZ$60 for a dodgy chain pizza!

We were up early this morning as Oslo Budget Hotel has a ridiculous rule of not having a place to store bags for the day, meaning guests have to lug their luggage around with them if their flight isn’t until later that evening. Wanting to make the most out of our weekends, we obviously fall into this category, so up we got determined to navigate our way to Vigelandsparken before our required check out time. Vigelandsparken is a famous sculpture park and we were keen to see it before the crowds arrived and without our bags. It was so beautiful and we imagine a local picnic hotspot. The afternoon was spent sipping on hot chocolate and daydreaming on the grass – a lovely relaxing day, before we set off to the airport. Our flight leaves at 6ish meaning with the time difference, we’ll be back in Clapham by about 9.30pm.





Because of our no eating policy, we feel we took on Oslo and won somewhat. The world’s most expensive city didn’t manage to bankrupt us, although our bank account sure took a hammering with little to show for it. Regardless of this fact, Oslo is a neat place and one we would recommend.

Next week we’re driving to Newquay with Kalem, Ryan and Philly, before I head off to Cannes for 11 days in June.

Love to all.

xxxx

Love in Lisbon

As I type this update I am sitting on a plane, covered in sand still, wearing a bikini under my dress, feeling utterly relaxed and head over heels in love with Lisbon. If I could live in any city in the world, Lisbon would be it, and this short weekend trip has sparked a passion for anything Portuguese. In fact, after we finish up on our Visas we're going to travel through Portugal and Southern Spain for a month or so. But even a month wouldn't be enough. As I said, I am so in love with Lisbon!

What a weekend - wonderful 30 degree heat all day every day, a crew of 21 friends and many, many hilarious times. We couldn't have had a more perfect weekend to celebrate our engagement.


We arrived on the Friday night, slightly tipsy from free red wine, giggling away at all and sundry. Our hostel was right in amongst it all, but as Lisbon isn't particularly big (population of around 700,000) everything was within walking distance.

Upon arrival at the hostel the other 11 members of the group were waiting and we spent the night drinking free shots and getting reacquainted with one another. Our crew included a mix of newer friends and old, and despite having an extremely large group which obviously presents logistical details, we all operated together perfectly, sticking together and getting on like a house on fire.




Saturday we were up in time to fill ourselves with a delicious free breakfast, before embarking on a free walking tour organised by our hostel. Due to our large number we had our own tour guide, who operated at our pace as we lazily wandered our way around the beautiful city, visiting main squares, castles, crumbling facades which were ruined in the catastrophic earthquake in 1755, whilst slurping back the ice-blocks at an attempt at keeping cool in the 30 degree heat! The tour ended at a big flea market which we wandered around, before stopping at a lovely bar on the cliff, overlooking the cathedral and ocean.



After stopping for a photo shoot with Morgan, we were running through the street to catch up with the group, giggling away, and I was struck with a sense that life just doesn't get better. I've said it before, I'll say it again - I absolutely love Lisbon. I know we love it all and enjoy each weekend or trip, which is why I was so surprised to be as blown away as I was. I was starting to think I was an old hat at this travelling game!


Our next stop was the Jeronimos Monastery, which we caught a tram to before jumping off halfway when we caught a glimpse of the dreaded ticket inspectors. Brad and I being the lickarses we are, we'd already brought our tickets, but we still had fun sneaking off with the rest of them, letting our daredevil streak run loose vicariously through the others! We walked the rest of the way along the river and whilst we were all bagging on Donna for declaring a 40 minute walk, as being 'just a 10 min walk around the corner', I was secretly enjoying the fun in the sun. After a hard winter in which the only sun we saw was a delicious two week stint in NZ, we were all keen to make the most of the tanning time.


The monastery was amazing, as were the delicious Portuguese custard tarts which are famed for being the best in the world. They were much nicer cold than warm, but after stuffing mine in before they had a chance to cool, I only learned this after scrounging around Morgan a few hours later!


It was then close to six and so we decided to head back for a kip. I opted to wander around Lisbon some more whilst the team relaxed - I just couldn't get enough. I ended up sitting on the pier watching the cruise ships come in and out, as well as the little fishes swimming around - that is, until I noticed a pack of creepy African men making lecherous gestures at me. Creeps! I scurried away before I was sold into the Portuguese sex trade unable to escape due to an expensive crack habit, and joined the rest of the team who were now lying in the lounge rehydrating with glasses of sangria.


Our hostel, voted the best hostel worldwide for groups, was AWESOME and offered an authentic Portuguese four course meal with three free drinks, for just eight euro. This saved the hassle of having to make a reservation elsewhere for 20+ and came highly recommended by Donna who had flown out on the Wednesday. It was flipping amazing and meant we essentially had our own private party and could be as raucous as we wanted, and raucous we were!


We'd also arranged to take part in a pub crawl, which saw us guided around the city by partying experts and we all had a ball visiting different bars and clubs. The evening wasn't without its dramas, which we all laughed ourselves silly over the following day, but the only downside was that Morgs was pickpocketed. The bars are down tiny cobbled streets and party-goers spill out all over the show, meaning you have to navigate your way through crowds. As we were walking through Morgs felt someone tugging at her bag and knew straight away what had happened, but by the time she turned around to confront them, they'd disappeared into the crowds taking her new and beloved iPhone and credit card with her. Thankfully she had travel insurance and cancelled her credit card straight away. She didn't let it ruin her night though and carried on like nothing had happened - a real trooper.


The next day we laughed ourselves sick retelling stories, and because there were 21 of us, everyone had new gossip to share which left our sides aching. The only sensible solution on this beautifully hot day was to head to the beach, so off we went to Caixa, where we spent the afternoon slurping on ice-creams, swimming in the Atlantic and peering at all the crazies on the beach. The water was divine, although super cold - a strong contrast to the 30 degree heat, and those that could face the water (myself included) felt their hangovers dissipate as the salt water worked its magic.


Sadly we had to head to the airport at around 4pm, saying goodbye to a few of the lucky ones who are able to stay on in Portugal for longer. Hamish, Laura and Sarah aren't working at the moment, and so are staying on indefinitely until London calls - either London, or the debt collector anyhow!

Lisbon provided a barrel of laughs right up the very last second and the plane and tube ride back home, still had us giggling away. Not to mention the fact that we were up until well after 1am, still reminiscing and laughing at the photos.

It was the most perfect weekend - wonderful friends, lovely weather and a beautiful city. I swear, I could easily slot into this city, never to leave and I'm already counting down the days until I can return!


Love to all.

xx

Show us your Krakow!

Well we’ve had a gorgeous four days in Krakow, Poland and can safely recommend this as a travel destination for all – cheap, cheerful and the people are simply divine! Despite what is widely-recognised as one of the most devastating and saddest histories, Poland is a beautiful and cheerful place with one of the best cuisines for sure! Let it be said, that as of tomorrow I am on my summer slim-down plan, because I’m quickly turning into a pierogi – a delicious Polish dumpling.


We arrived on Thursday night to a lovely man named Brov, holding up my name on a sign. Our fabulous accommodation, Globtroter Krakow, had arranged for airport transfers at just a small fraction more. Poland = delightfully cheap. Driven to our amazingly central accommodation, we were given a firsthand guide into the things to eat and the places to see. We also had an incredibly interesting chat about the Polish economy and how thousands immigrated to the UK in search of jobs and to get away from the post-communism hold, when Poland joined the EU. Now times are changing and many are returning, and after our fleeting four day visit, it is easy to see why. Brov was our first insight into how kind, helpful and truly good at heart Polish people are. They seem wiser than most and have suffered at the hands of Nazi German, Communist Russia and so much more over the years, yet they still remain decent.


We woke up on Friday torn between two minds – exploring this beautiful city, or waving our metaphorical Union Jack flags as we watched the union between Kate and Wills! We opted for the latter and after spending half an hour or so trying to find a place that was showing the wedding, we grabbed a few obwarzanki, popular Polish pretzel type things, and headed back to our pad to watch the wedding on our only English channel – CNN. It would have been wonderful to have been in London for the big day, but a four day bank holiday weekend was just too much temptation!


We then hit the town square, which is the largest medieval square in Europe don’t you know, where we did some more exploring before sitting down for our first serving of hearty Polish food (hearty being the key word). Brad ordered bigos, a type of fermented cabbage and sausage stew, which was suggested by Brov, while I opted for pierogi ruski – dumplings stuffed with cottage cheese and potato, covered in fried onion. The food is as delicious as it sounds.


We then headed towards Wawel Hill which is home to beautiful castles, gardens and cathedrals, before strolling through Kazimierz, the old Jewish Quarter of Poland – basically where Krakow’s Jewish population lived before all 65,000 were wiped out in the holocaust. A little piece of information – Schindler’s List is about Krakow’s Jews and is set in Kazimierz.


We explored the old markets and synagogues, before heading back to the old town to check out the famous souvenir markets, which are famed for their amber, which is found all over Poland. We didn’t purchase any of the orange jewels, but we did pick up a few free beer vouchers which very much came in handy later that night!

Brad had done his research and had found a place called Chlopski Jadlo, which is a fantastic Polish restaurant that came very much recommended, so off we trotted to stuff our faces once more. Despite a rocky start with the free starter which consisted of bread with a cheese type spread, as well as a tub of lard with pork fat chunks (literally), our appetite quickly picked up when our pierogis were served, followed by my potato pancakes with goulash and Brad’s roulade and dumplings. We just can’t get enough of that Polish food, and Dad – you would be all over it like a rash! Next stop, a cute little bar on the river playing Polski music, where we claimed our free beer vouchers! I was a little tipsy by this stage and keen to carry the night on to check out the nightlife Krakow is famed for, but Brad was feeling far too bloated to even contemplate another sip of beer, and at 12.30am I could hardly argue!



The next day we had booked a trip out to Auschwitz and Birkenau. Many people don’t realise just how huge Aushwitz was, in fact it is split over three camps and was the Nazi’s largest concentration/ death camp. We went on a guided tour with a Polish man who was incredibly moving and informative. At the end he truly had us near tears when he reminded us that this happened only 60 years ago, not even a generation, in civilised Europe. He talked about how it all started with an ideology, just as many ideologies are present today, and at this stage there was never even a suggestion of what it would become, but of course, it did. He explained how the Jewish were a supposedly easy target – sadly there has always been an undercurrent of anti-Semitism in Europe and as the Jewish had no army, they were an easy target. He concluded with saying how this happened only 60 years ago because no one spoke up, reminding us that since the holocaust it has happened several times again – in Cambodia, Rwanda and Darfur.


I won’t go into too much detail – we saw the piles of hair, shoes and suitcases, photographs and even a shocking video which showed the camp’s liberation from the Red Army. In the video it’s difficult not to see the emaciated corpses lying on the ground. The suitcases were the worst for me – because the Western European Jews had little idea of what was going on, they still had hope, so when they were shipped to Auschwitz in cattle trucks they took their suitcases, filled with their belongings. The suitcases had names and birthdays written on them, little love hearts and drawings on some – listing addresses of many places we have been to. The shocking thing is nearly all of these people were killed instantly upon arrival at Auschwitz-Birkenau.


Birkenau was purely a death camp and to this day, has the most sombre sad atmosphere – birds don’t seem to fly there, you can see the remains of hundreds of dorms (each sleeping 800 men) and huge gas chambers (the Nazis tried to blow a lot of it up to cover up what they had done)... It’s a haunting place.
I know it isn’t nice to hear about it, but as our guide said – those that don’t know about history, are sure to live through it again. We couldn’t even fathom what had happened and on what scale – it defies belief and certainly leaves its mark on you. Understandably, we didn’t really feel like doing much that evening after such a big day, so we headed to a local restaurant, stuffed our face with more Polish food and retired to our room to watch Harry Potter (again!).



The next day we had thought we’d head to Warsaw for the day, which is quite far away but with the speedy Polish trains you’re there in a few hours. Unfortunately the people at the ticket office weren’t particularly helpful due to the language barrier and it seemed that we’d have to wait until 1pm to catch the next train, so it wasn’t worth it. Instead we headed out Wieliczka to visit the famous Salt Mines, which is a UNESCO world heritage site and in my opinion, an absolute waste of life. After waiting outside in the pouring rain for an hour to catch the obligatory tour, we traipsed down 120 metres into the earth for a three hour tour looking at all sorts of utter shite made out of salt. I couldn’t have cared less. This is all I’m going to say about Wieliczka as quite frankly, I don’t want to waste any more of the time left in my life writing about it. I had more fun at Auschwitz.



Three hours later we were back in Krakow (praise be to the lord), where we were greeted with all sorts of festivities as of course it was 1 May 2011, the day on which Jean Paul II was beautified. Given he’s Polish, Jean Paul is all the rage in Poland and the entire town square was turned into a giant photo album, which was really quite a beautiful sight to behold. After relaxing in the town square and looking at sucky salt statues all day, we were ravenous, so off we hopped for some more Polish cuisine. This time we headed down the Polish soup track, as well as 101 pierogis to accompany. Sour milk, barszcz (hot beetroot) and chicken buillon – soups to soothe the soul and each one more delicious than the last!


Today we awoke with a spring in our step – it was our last day in Krakow and we were keen to make the most of it, so with a couple of obwarzanki in hand we wandered through the twisting, turning streets, stumbling across all sorts of hidden gems – including a big market fair, complete with a fire-breathing dragon and deep fried cheese (my kind of market). We wandered along the river, made our way through the Jewish Quarter, ate up a storm, before relaxing in the sun in the town square, eating cake and sipping juice, watching the world go by. We then made our way to the neighbouring square, where Brad had a little snooze in the sun, and I watched the thousands of Polish children playing in the most beautiful water fountain. On the whole, Polish kids seems pretty smart, but there were a few slightly slower lemons amongst the bunch that didn’t quite get their timing right and ended up soaked to the skin – this was my favourite part!




By the time the sun had gone behind the clouds and I’d started to get a tad nervous that a creepy foreign woman would be reported to the Policja for lurking around the fountain and staring at the Polski children, I decided it was time to wake Brad up and spend our zlotys on one last meal. We found a gem of a place and spent a few hours in a cosy little dungeon restaurant, sipping at barszcz and chomping on pierogis, with only one minor incident where we dropped our digital camera into a stein of beer! Cést la vie!

A slow walk along the river and back to the markets, before we headed back to catch our transfer to the airport, where once again we were greeted by Brov – a lovely end to a lovely journey. Brov also told us that Osama Bin Laden had been killed – it seems our long weekend in Poland was at a time of historical importance. In years from now when people ask us where we were when Osama was killed, Kate and William were married, and Pope Jean Paul was beautified, we’ll be able to proudly remember our time in this beautiful Polish city.

xxx